The Two Coaches Within!

Two coaches find an abode within us called Second Me and First Me!

Close your eyes and listen to the conversation between the coaches within.

The one who advocates farsightedness, infinite-mindedness, choices away from your immediate comfort-zone that appear difficult to follow is Second Me.

The one who advocates comfort-zone, self-centric short-termism and finite-mindedness that appears comfortable and natural to follow is First Me.

What kind of coach do you hire from within in your daily life? You must choose one!

Which one do you choose and nurture: First Me or Second Me? The choice is yours!

What legacy you will leave depends on what choices you make in your daily life!

Take the side of First Me in your day-to-day life and live like an ordinary animal: Come, eat, sleep, grow like vegetable, reproduce, and Go!

Take the side of Second me in your day-to-day life and build a beautiful legacy, transforming the lives of millions from generation to generation like an extraordinary man in ordinary attire.

“How to capitalize on these two incredible coaches hidden within you irrespective of who you are or what you do is what this book is all about!”

So, are you ready to begin the journey from zero to hero irrespective of where you are now?

Let us begin and learn how to handle the two amazing coaches within -Second Me & First Me to build a beautiful legacy for self, family, community, organization, society, nation and humanity a whole irrespective of who you are!

With love and care,

(Ram Raj)

Foreword By Former Director of Human Resources, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd

It gives me great pleasure to see Mr Ram Raj transformed as an author while remaining as practising business manager in the area of Learning and Development. I remember being on the Interviewing Committee for selecting Information system Officers in 2007. He made the cut, and I had the privilege to work with him when I was Executive Director, heading the Indian Oil Institute of Petroleum Management at Gurgaon where Mr Ram Raj worked in the Information Systems Department. I feel great pride to realize that Indian Oil Corporation Ltd can provide its people, an environment where they can rediscover themselves to fulfil both- their personal and professional goals. The author’s journey from an Information Systems Officer to a Learning and Development professional and from thereon to metamorphosis as an author is inspiring. The book abounds with many insights as viewed by an observant young business professional, as he traverses through the journey of working in an organization. It has many interesting insights & actionable thoughts for readers irrespective of their calling in life! Wish that the Almighty amazingly bless his creative effort & it touches the heart & mind of readers & inspires them to unleash their full potential to be people who make a useful contribution to the society they serve, and also derive satisfaction from that. Wishing Mr Ram Raj all the best and hope this may be the beginning of more creativity that would flow from his thoughts into written form.

Verghese Cherian,

Former Director of Human Resources

Indian Oil Corporation Ltd

.....Advance Praise Words...

“I had an opportunity to be with and observe the author of the book during his posting at Indian Oil Institute of Petroleum Management. He was always a Yes Go-getter, a True Starter and a Team Man. Always eager to do things differently and deliver beyond expectations. His book titled “Being in the driving seat – What makes the ordinary extraordinary” is a true reflection of his attributes and attitudes towards work, team and organization. He always practised what he expected others to demonstrate.

This book is a must-read for corporate professionals who wish to shine as a business leader and create a unique impact in the world around them. The concept of universal leadership prism for business leaders and entrepreneurs can be a great help to readers in achieving what they wish to achieve in life as a business leader or entrepreneur! It advocates doing mundane things consistently well and keep changing the management style. It has the potential to transform everyone willing to participate and play with techniques shared.”

– CK Tiwari, Executive Director & Head -IiPM, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Indian Oil Institute of Petroleum Management (IiPM) Gurugram

“The book, “Being in the driving seat-What makes the ordinary extraordinary!” is a must-read for everyone who wishes to understand the real importance & significance of relationship in life irrespective of who they are or what they do. The universal driving seat model propounded by the author in the book can be a great help to readers in assessing the critical areas of their life where they have opportunities to improve and make a positive difference- The choices one makes in day-to-day life makes a real difference!” – Dr Raj Singh Antil, Joint Directors, Shri Vishwakarma skill university Haryana, Chairman ISTD Gurugram Chapter.

“I have seen the author growing while working with me and have witnessed his professional journey at Indian Oil Corporation Ltd since he became part of Indian Oil. His life journey from the hard-core technical Information Technology professional to HR professional turned author is inspiring for working professionals irrespective of what they do, irrespective of the industry they belong to. The author has propounded simple, yet profound ‘7 Steps ESCAPE velocity model to design the life you love to live’ which if put into action in day-to-day life can become a turning point in reader’s life & experience.” – Deepak Agarwal, Executive Director, Information System, Corporate Information System Department, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Gurugram.

“Mr Ramraj is highly motivated and committed professional. Combining the key skills of IT and HR, he is an independent creative thinker.

This book is a testimony to his continued enthusiasm and focus towards promoting managerial effectiveness. The 21 success mantras he recommends for managers and the concept of 21 non-negotiable focus areas (NFA) for business leaders and entrepreneurs are interesting and valuable pointers that can help readers a lot in their professional lives. I wish the book every success.” – Urvija Bajpai, Chief General Manager, Learning & Development, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Indian Oil Institute of Petroleum Management Gurugram.

“The concept of “Universal driving seat”, “Goalpost of life” and “Infinite Possibilities to make choices in day-to-day life” to write the story of life which one loves to write with simple yet propound frameworks and models propounded by the author in the book will allow readers not only to have a holistic vision for life but also help them to embark on the journey of their dream life unleashing their full potential irrespective of who they are or what they do!....” – PS Rathore, Founder & CEO, ATC- The learning App, Motivational Speaker, Author of Discover the power within.

“God bless you Ram Raj; your book is full of inspiration to everyone who wishes to do something in life not only for self but for others too. The concept of escape velocity model is thought-provoking, and it is a simple yet profound framework to achieve the goal and stay grounded in simplicity. I wish you much more success in life.” – M. Srinivas, Former Executive Director, IndianOil Institute of Petroleum Management, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Gurugram.

“The book presents simple yet effective ways for the development of working professionals and entrepreneurs through simple yet profound models like ‘Universal leadership prism’, ‘Twenty-one non-negotiable focus areas’ and ‘ESCAPE velocity model to accomplish the envisioned goal of life you love to live in’” – Dr Harsh Sachdev, Executive Director, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd.

“The book, “Being in the Driving Seat-What makes the ordinary extraordinary” provides a common language, concepts and frameworks to turn the dream life into a reality. It is a must-read book for the coaches and coachees to produce effective results out of the coaching relationship. The 7 Steps ESCAPE velocity model to design the life you love to live can prove to be a turning point in the reader’s life provided they take actions on wisdom, treasured in the book!” – Gaurav Arora, ICF Certified MCC(ICF) Coach, Founder and CEO, Xmonks.

“This book is a true companion for human resource professionals, managers, coaches, mentors, trainers, business leaders and entrepreneurs. It will help them understand the underlying human growth needs - Why do they think what they think?; Why do they feel what they feel?; Why do they want what they want?; Why do they do what they do?

In the area of talent leadership, the book clearly emphasizes and outlines the significance of the concept - One size fits all is a myth!” - Shailesh Tiwari, Chief General Manager, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd.

“The universal leadership prism framework is a simple yet profound framework which can be put into practice by the business leaders or entrepreneur. It is a handy model for corporate leaders, senior executives and entrepreneurs for their daily leadership meditation cum self-help reflection toolkit!” – Raj Kumar Dubey, Executive Director, Uttar Pradesh State office-II, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd.

“The book is full of practical wisdom with simple yet profound self-help exercises from different walk of life. It is a must-read book for every student and working professional alike to have a big picture of the world within and outside which will help them to navigate the life journey successfully irrespective of what they are or what they do.” – Rajesh Kumar Jaiswar, General Manager, Information system, Indian Oil Institute of Petroleum Management, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd Gurugram.

“The book presents a holistic, big picture view of the growth opportunity available to every human being irrespective of their current situation with actionable learning nuggets from all walk of life. It is a must-read book for every student and working professional to design the life they love to live!” – Nilesh R Nikaljay, General Manager Learning & Development, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Mumbai.

“The book provides a common language, concepts, and frameworks to turn the dream life into reality. It is a must read book for mentors, coaches, mentees, coaches, and learning & development professional to produce effective results out of the coaching or mentoring relationship.” – OM Prakash, General Manager Learning & Development, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd New Delhi.

“Simple yet profound 21 secrets for working professionals propounded in the book to lead a happy & joyful life striking a balance between personal and professional life is a must-read for any working professional irrespective of their industry, domain or sector.” – Sushobit Maity, Senior Institutional Business Manager, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd Mumbai.

“Going up in the corporate ladder is never a big challenge; the actual challenge is to do it joyfully. If you dream of reaching on top of the corporate ladder, imbibe the 21 secrets of happy & joyful working professional life. The book presents simple yet profound frameworks full of actionable learning nuggets to design the life you love to live.

This book is a unique and rare blend of professional carrier and personal life, provides insights into self-development soft skills using insightful of 21 none-negotiable focus areas. Complements for covering the universal leadership insight prism required in daily life, in simplistic words.” – Alok K. Roy, President Indian Oil Officers Association, President National Confederation of Officers Association, Deputy General Manager (Gas), Business Development, Corporate Office, Indian Oil Corporation Limited.

“The simple yet propound driving seat model provides readers with a way forward irrespective of what one does or who one is in current time. The book gives hope to everyone with doable action steps to achieve the dream life which one aspires to live provided actions are taken on the ground!” – NK Bamania, Senior Manager Production & Secretary IndianOil officers Association, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Mathura Refinery, Mathura.

“The book, “Being in the Driving Seat” is full of simple yet profound learning nuggets, which, if put into action, can prove to be transformational in life. It will help and motivate readers to put many actionable life learnings, which we know but are not able to put into action in day-to-day life to get better results. This book will also help the readers to recall their role and responsibilities as human beings and will provide a path forward to achieve success, joy, and happiness in life.” – Garima Shahi, Senior Process Engineer & Treasury Indian Oil officers Association, Indian Oil Corporation Ltd, Mathura Refinery, Mathura.

“The book, “Being in the Driving Seat” revolves around the core concept -The first me and second me! The journey from the ordinary to extraordinary irrespective of who you are in current situation rests on the choices you make and whom to listen and follow in day-to-day life – The first me or second me! The book is a must-read for the person who wants to excel and shine irrespective of the area of expertise and field.” – Dr Akhilesh Patel, Assistant Professor Department of Teacher Education, Ramnagar PG College Barabanki, UP.

“If you are someone who dreams of creating the dream world you love to live and need a life-long companion, coach, friend and philosopher while on the journey of the dream life irrespective of who you are today! The answer lies in the book ‘Being in the driving seat-What makes ordinary extraordinary’. It provides actionable models and frameworks to turn the dream life into reality irrespective of what you do or who you are!” – Dr Yogesh Kumar Upadhyaya, Past National President, Indian Society for Training & Development.

“Well- structured segmentation of the energy gap between existing life and the life we love to live, provides clarity of the vision and enables the reader to take effective actions to achieve higher goals in life. Structured strategies make the transition smooth and the landing soft.”- Sudha Kumari, Executive Trainee, IndianOil Corporation Limited, Mathura Refinery.

About the Book

Are you someone who wants to design the life which you’d love to live? Are you someone who wants to help people to design the life they’d love to live? Are you someone who wants to design the world which you love to see and live? Are you someone who wants to help other people to design the world they love to see and live? If the response to any of these questions is “Yes”, then you are holding the right book in your hand!

This book can be a guide, companion, coach, mentor, friend, and philosopher in your journey irrespective of who you are today and what you want to be in future!

The book is a reflection of the author’s own journey of life and aspiration to inspire and empower people to make a positive difference in the life of self, family, organization, community, society, nation, and humanity as a whole, for the just cause.

At times, life does not unfold as you wish to, and you feel lonely—only you believe what you believe in! As a student or as a common man or as a working professional or as an entrepreneur or as a business leader, are you struggling to manage and lead the transition from one goalpost to another? Are you feeling lonely? Are you procrastinating due to whatsoever reason? Are you stuck on the way in your journey of life? This book will let you keep going in all phases of your life, especially when you are undergoing a tough time. It will help you in achieving the extraordinary results in life through the “ESCAPE Velocity Model to Design the Life you Love to Live!” Also, if you are a professional coach and trainer or if you are someone who wishes to help other people around you at home or workplace to design the life they wish to live, it will provide you with a comprehensive framework—”Driving Seat Model to Design The World You Love to Live.” So, are you ready to make a positive difference without giving up? Do not go ahead alone; go with your true friend, companion, coach, mentor and guide—Being in the Driving Seat: What makes the Ordinary Extraordinary, irrespective of where you are and where you want to go and successfully accomplished the journey from “Design the life you love to live” to “Design the world you love to see and live”.