My Birth, Schooling and College

After thinking about writing my autobiography for more than five years, here I am finally, with my first-ever book. I will narrate my entire story, which includes all my ups and downs and my thinking processes, how I chose not to be bedridden and how I explored new things in life to be happy so that I could make others happy. My story starts from Dhanbad, which is a small town in Jharkhand, and it completed its full circle and ended in New Delhi.

Dhanbad is a small town in Jharkhand, where I was born on October 20, 1975. My father was sweating with a company called Karam Chand Thapar in the underground mines. My mother was a typical Indian homemaker. That was a distinctive era, where a girl couldn’t talk to a boy, and they were not authorised to leave their home, until and unless there was some urgent work. College to house and vice-a-versa. My maternal grandmother was a widow who was very strict. She worked at one of the TATA hospitals, in a place called Jamadoba. She never allowed any of her seven daughters to go out. Still, my dad managed to win my mother’s heart, and after two years of struggle in their love story, they finally got married in December 1974. Imagine two completely different families, cultures, tastes, and languages, forming a union. Still, they convinced each other’s family and got married. They began well in their new innings. Romance, of course, was in the air, and this is how I was born on October 20, 1975, in the same hospital where my granny worked.

My parents were not from a well-to-do family. I had a very modest upbringing with limited support. Still, they determined to put all three of us, (me, my younger brother and sister), in an English medium school. It was difficult to afford three kids in an English medium school. Neighbours and friends often suggested to my parents to put us in a Hindi medium school. But my parents were always adamant and eager to put all their efforts, energy and commitment into keeping us in a good English medium school. This is why we watched our neighbours celebrating Holi and Diwali with all their wealth. Meanwhile, our financial situation was a bit more vulnerable due to our parents’ thought process of imparting good tutelage to all three of us.

My Mom & Dad in their Anniversary

I was extremely poor in studies from standard one to standard five. However, when I acknowledged the hard-earned money of our parents and that I was not doing justice to their struggles, I started taking my studies seriously. From a backbencher, I made my way to the front row. In standard five, out of 40 students, I stood sixth, which I categorically remember, because this was when I realised that I was also a champion and could do anything I wanted to. Some people work hard and don’t get good results. I was one of them. In standard 10, I just scored 50 per cent. I always knew that I was much better than those who had scored higher than me. I kept trying and worked hard. At least this was in my control. My dad always wanted me to graduate in science, and hence, I took up Physics Hons, in a goon’s college named RSP College Jharia, Jharkhand. With 50 per cent marks in class 12, no one from a celebrated college would give me admission. Hence, without wasting much time, I accepted the seat, but there was always one thinking which backed me up, and that was to complete my graduation and fly away to Delhi for some jobs. In small towns, corporate jobs were not available. However, India had transformed to great heights, and people did get offers in small towns as well!

We had an excellent life, till my father worked in Karam Chand Thapar. We wore the best clothes, ate good food and enjoyed outings while studying in an esteemed English medium school. However, my father lost his job because Karam Chand Thapar closed their project in Jharkhand. This was another setback for all of us, which pulled us down. I calmly thought of helping the family. I started taking tuitions. The struggle of my life’s chapter started from this point onwards. My father started his own business with limited resources. He worked as a contractor, where only after finishing the entire project, he got paid in one go. But even before receiving the cheque, he often spent a lot of money to get his bill passed through various government clerical staff. Hence, he had a very limited amount at his disposal.

I still remember our principal calling me to my brother’s class, and in front of everyone, he said, “If you guys can’t make the payment on time, then why the hell are you three studying here?”

I went back home with a lot of distress and humility and told everything to my mother. She calmed me with her motivational speech. Later, I became occupied with so many things to support my father. I slept only for four to five hours and spent the entire day doing college work. In the evening, I took six to seven tuitions to help the family and at night, I did combined studies with my college friends. For three entire years, this was my routine, and this was not all. We resided in rented accommodation. My young brother and sister were still in school. Their school tuition, house rent, my college expenses, my professor’s tuition fees and my mother’s poor health, all added to the difficulties I faced, along with my father.

Me in 3rd STD, Model School CFRL Dhanbad Bottom Lane, 2nd from Left

I was handling things somehow, and that was when my younger brother, who was in class 10 said, “Brother, I also want to do something for the family.”

“You are too young to do anything,” I responded.

The next morning, my brother said, “Brother, you don’t worry, I have also started taking tuitions for junior classes.”

I felt untroubled and emotional at the same time. A small help, at the time of emergency, can change your entire thinking process. More than that, I thought my siblings were dependant and followed the oldest, without being asked to do so. Since I was determined to earn some money, he also got the idea to take tuitions for junior students.

I hugged him and said, “You have now grown up and are more mature and intelligent than me.”

In between all this, I also trained, investing time in my passion, which was to play cricket. I was a good all-rounder. I bowled, batted and also kept wicket. I was never a sportsperson until I reached standard 11. I had stewarded one of my school houses, in the 400-metre race. My mother told me that she would be there on the grounds, to see how we all three performed in sports. She never came to see us in school. This made me determined not to disappoint her with my usual poor show. I made up my mind and prepared for a few days before the event. On the day of the event, when I saw the opponents, all with well-built bodies and in standard 12, I told myself that I didn’t want my mother to feel bad in front of the other parents. Hence, I had to run the race of my life. That was my first race ever, where parents from across all classes, came to see us competing. Believe me, I never saw who I was running with and what my position was. I kept on running till someone said the race was finished and that I had stood third in the race. It was another achievement that I will never forget. I saw my mother giving me a standing ovation, and I felt on top of the world.

Coming back to cricket, I was the champion player of my club called Sunrise Club and this was the only thing which consoled me and put a little smile on my face, because we as a family were not doing great in terms of finances. We somehow made all ends meet. But we had a strong bond between all five of us. I played hundreds of matches across Jharkhand, Bengal, and Bihar and won so many certificates, medals, and trophies. I also got the chance to play for my college. We won so many matches, series and trophies while playing for my college and these wins were very memorable. I was 5’8” tall, fair, studied in an English medium school and was also a good cricketer. What more do you want than to be recognised in school or college. I kept on playing cricket in the hope that someday, a revelation would happen and I would enter the Indian Cricket team. That never occurred, but with that big dream, I managed to play district level cricket. These were the best years of my life, with so many gully friends, cricket matches, mother’s and father’s love, studies, tournaments, and love from all the neighbours, for my good behaviour and for always taking on challenging tasks in life. Our neighbours always quoted me as an example in front of their children. In fact, all three of us were very disciplined and hard-working.