Enlightenment at the Traffic Signal

Today With her shiny wet hair and a cloth in her hand she gazed and smiled at me while standing on the footpath near the signal. I told myself that finally there is some worth in this non-productive waiting at this red light. For a few days,That gaze was almost an everyday affair, sometimes the cloth was replaced with dustbin bags and wet hair was replaced with a dirty hat,hat to protect her from the ruthless sun and bags to protect her from starving.But the shine on her visible hair remained the same. She used to ask few people if they wanted the bags (don’t know how she decided the probability of choosing a few probable assumed customers among this big crowd waiting at the signal) but somehow, she used to manage to get something out of everyone she decided to approach, (I mumbled to myself marketing students should take some lessons from her). She was also used to the eyes which used to travel from her head to toe waiting at some important stops,and also to that lustful touch of people who might be fantasizing about her when they masturbate at night after a hectic day at work,I used to watch her and become numb and imagine how her day would end,and what would she be doing at night,does she also has a part time job where she is a prostitute,or is she studying for exams and dreaming to become another inspirational story,which runs in news for few days after watchin,which we start to feel ashmed of ourself.Many such thoughts,But one thought was mainly prominent which was that,is she a virgin? Almost not! She was a good looking girl with slim and attractive body structure worth carving in the caves of ajanta,Lovely Dark long black hair with a flower tucked in it, Mysterious yet Beautiful gray eyes with the ability to enter in the soul with its gaze.Living on a footpath, with a tender age of around fourteen,fifteen years. Maybe she had lost her virginity to a drunk rich man at 2 pm in the night when she was sold by her dirty drunk father to a clean rich old man, or maybe by a group of local goons that had their eyes on her since she was ten. But today all I could feel was the warmth of that smile, and the smell of the garbage truck in front of me. Both I couldn’t escape. The signal turned green and I was forced to move by the angry sounds of horns somehow miraculously synchronizing with each other.That whole day her face lingered in front of my eyes, I couldn't concentrate at the teacher nor at the lizard which I used to when bored with the lecture, while returning I stopped at the other side to see if she is there but was disappointed to not seeing her.And I went home waiting the sun to go down and the moon to rise and the moon to go down again just so that the sun could rise.

Usually I disliked wasting time on traffic signals,But the next day I stopped even at the green one,And there she was in a red dress talking with another girl,which I guessed was her friend.She saw me and said something to her and then they both smiled,Leaving her behind,she came close to me with her hypnotizing gaze,Pink lipstick on her lips and bunch of black dustbin bags in her hand.She approached me with a smile, I asked the price of the bag,fifty rupees only, she answered.While we both smiled, I removed the money from my wallet and stopped for a second.Something inside me took over,something animal,something wild.Suddenly I was Blank! Empty! Throat Dry, My eyes focused on her tender hands, and the next second I found myself holding them. I couldn't remember much except that it happened too fast.My eyes were locked at her face.She gave me the bag, denied money, looked down and walked away.All i could see was that she kept walking till she disappeared. That whole day I felt nauseated and exhausted by thinking about that event,but finally I ended up convincing myself that it is just an everyday event for her,Nothing big deal.I should not overthink about it. But no matter how much I tried to convince myself I couldn't escape the vacuum that was created by myself which was pulling me.The next day when I stopped at the signal, I was shocked to notice that everything was the same, the blurred red light, the warm tar road, the filthy voice of the crow sitting on the dead rat, Except the 3 things which were absent.Her Gaze.Her Smile. And her beautiful Shiny Black Hair.