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And she died...

by Faisal shahid Brown(F.S.Brown)   

As I recall that fatefull day in my mind,pictures of the events the death of our mother roll like a film before my inner eyes.It was a sunny,warm day in samura,the town we all lived in.school had finished for the day and my sister Gudiya and I were on our way home.As we turned corner into our road,we noticed a small group of people and an ambulance car outside our house.We looked each other and shrugged our shoulders,thinking,it was probably an elderly person near our house being taken ill or even died,so they called for the ambulance.As we approached our house,we suddenly realised it was our house,they were visiting.Our front door stood wider open and father stood in the doorway,awaiting our arrival.As we dashed toward him,I noticed he had been crying.His kind dark eyes were filled with tears and slowly down his cheeks. Gudiya and I threw our arms around him,all of asudden fearfull what might have happned."Dad what happened?''I asked."Its your mother,Ram",he replied,and trying to hold back tears."she was in kitchen,when she suddenly reached for chest.A muffled noise,like,a cry came out mouth,and she collapsed on to the kitchen floor and didn't move anymore. The Doctor is still with her,he explained to our uncle, who had arrived after got informed about the situation."with these words he put his arms around us and we walked inside the room where my mother was being checked by doctors.I could see her eyes closed,pale skin,and little sweatbeads covered her forehead.her chest moved heavily up and down,her breathing was laboured and I could here little rasping sounds escaping her mouth.Her lips had blue hue around them.Gudiya remained near the door,too sacred to come closer because she had been afraid of doctors,and would run whenever she encounterd a doctor.My father took mom's hand and held it. suddenly a trace of smile rushed over her face,she breathed a deep,long breath:it sounded like a soft sigh,and she took her last breath.Our mother had just died.The living room was in total silence,even the birds out side in the tall Neem tree had stopped singing and chirping,as if they knew most beloved person living in this house had died,and left this deceptive world forever.My father was to shake numbness,that had fallen to us, and went to the wardrobe to fetch a white linen sheet in order to cover her body with.I saw my mom's body was placed and wrapped in a long white cloth.Gudiya starded crying seeing mom's body covered,and she would have thought those people covering body to kill her.Dad took her out of the hall trying to manipulate her in his own way.And by now mom's lifeless body was placed near the large table,which was still covered with utensils,freshly prepared food, our mother had been busy with before she collapsed,who gave life to us was nomore.I held her hand last time,and I said thankyou and good bye my world's best Mom,tears rolled down my eyes and she was taken away for burial.

Slowly,the night gave birth to a new day ,the first day of ''living without mother''The days turned into weeks,our mother had been laid to rest according to our religion.Gudiya and myself were still in shock,we had no one to turn to for comfort.Our father had fallen into a deep depression,he hardly spoke to us,but when he did,he spoke angry,cruelly and would often beat us,when we seemed to have displeased him.We had to fend for ourselves,cook our food,wash our clothes.I tried to talk to him on behalf of my sister and myself,but he turned a deaf ear and a blind eye to our misery.Gudiya and I went to school everyday,came home,did our homework and then tried to cook ourselves a meagre meal. The house was usually empty when we came home,our dad being at work or somewhere,we did not know about.He only came home to sleep and eat a little of what we had left for him.He would get up early again to go back to work.It was as if he tried to keep his mind and heart closed to the fact that he had just lost his wife a few short weeks ago.The despair,that Gudiya and I were suffering,did not seem to reach him,or bother him at all.

Alas!our plight was noticed by a kind neighbour,the lady came to our door one afternoon and spoke to me as the oldest child and son of our family. She invited both of us to her house for the evening meal and enjoy some company with her own children.After that first evening Ayesha and I went to her house everyday after school. The kind lady fed us,washed our clothes and generally was like a mother tous.Again the weeks turn into months.Then the Miracle happened:One day,after school,we passed as everyday,our house in order to go to the neighbour's house.Then we saw him,our father,standing in our doorway,freshly dressed,with a big smile on his face. "Raml,Gudiya,come on in,there is a surprise waiting for both of you."Looking in total surprise at each other,we darted like arrows inside.There it was,our surprise:A clean house,a table laden with delicious dishes and the crown of the surprise: Two brandnew bicycles,one for Gudiya,one for me.Our father had returned to us in mind,spirit and in person.We hugged him in gratitude and overwhelming love. We felt that our lifes had just returned to some normality,the feeling of being loved,cared for and cherished returned at once. Our lifes carried on from now on without our beloved mother,who would never be forgotten and still remains to this day to be part of our lifes in our minds,hearts and memories.


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Copyright Faisal shahid Brown(F.S.Brown)