Broken Lantern

There are several spaces in our mind and heart that you just can’t fill them with something good when you are living in as cursed and treated on worst.

Every human being is born with a different gifts, some are blessed, some are lucky and some are running out of fate and traveling in to their cursed life. No one is important in this world for anyone I knew it and that was obvious. People live their life of their own motive and with their own possessiveness; all they want to live is just for their own. No one cares to live a life for others in this Earth; I don’t think there are people in this world who can really understand the language which I was always speaking to myself. I have never been able to make my conversation due to lack of being illiterate and for being myself as itinerate. I never learned things in my life because I have being through very harsh time, thou wish I can express that. But I have many words holding inside me which I can’t just pull it out from my inner human inside. I have never bothered and given time to my studies, when dad used to send me school but I was not able to grasp any single word from it. My father always told me son just LISTEN because this is the only gift you are being blessed and if you concentrate on it then you might just gain something from anything.

I love my dad a lot because he was the only one in this earth who can understand me at my core. Time has brought many problems in our life and those problems have always being as heavy like some huge heavy stone. I always use to go with my father, when they go out to work as labor on the building site. My father use to earn daily Rs.100 max for being a good labor, sometimes he is use to get more incentives for being a duteous labor. Today I am so drowned in my life, where I just feel is the darkness with an endless depth around me, I really can’t see any single way out of this now. I feel like I am trap in the world by coming in to this abnormal world which is not letting me express what I am being through and what is the real truth, which got me here in this dark room making me feel alone and lonely with no sense of life around me. I can’t even feel the air around me, it hurts me living in this place. I really wanna go out of here but how I am just another good person with innocence who is just got stuck in this boogey trap, which is made by possessive humans for the people who really have no words to argue for. I am in this prison since 4 years for being a witness of my father’s death. It all happened when me and my father were on the way back to home.

It was my birthday and my dad bought some chicken with some cold drinks, we both have planned to cook chicken on that day. My dad just came home with many things on that day like pen, book and some panchtantra story books. When dad entered the door with so many things I was like stupor for a moment I said myself “Thank you GOD for giving me such a wonderful life, no matter how I am and no matter how life was with me. My father accepted me for all.”

Happiness was all over me on that evening and I was happy a lot, my father cooked me chicken and rice. It was the only one happiest moment in my life because that day cried for the first time while feeding me with their lovely hands. I just wiped the tears off from my dad’s eye and even I started crying that moment, the aura which I got from that moment really made me cry out a lot. All I just know now was one thing in my life that my father is everything for me; he is my God, my mother and my angel. I still remember the day when my mother left me when I was just 7 years old, she left dad because of me.

My father always said that things happen in life for some reasons, no matter what you are and how you are just try to accept the world even you go insane and live as monster. All there is no option other than accepting for what have you being through and for what you will be through.

On my birthday after we had dinner, he just said to me son “I have something for you on this birthday.”

I was like, what surprise will it be? I was counting on it. He showed me two movie tickets which might be very costly too but he didn’t bother on it.

He said “Son today is your day of your life, so just forget everything in life and live life till the end. Tomorrow is today’s walk so just forget the path and just move your foot to it.”

All time I kept thinking was “My life is not working on words but still my father is able to grasp me well and guides me in every single thing. I am so blessed that I have lovely and caring father in my life.”

My dad was still watching me thinking and all of sudden he snapped his fingers to wake me up from my dreams. Hey Son wake up, we are getting almost late for the movie.

I shook my head with answering to my dad.

Dad were feeling so happy on that day, I can’t express how happiness was flowing and giving us so much of memories to remember. Everything seemed to be so silence and growing with glow around us with new light saying “Lighten the old lantern it has never been so hard”.

Less the time, more the happiness I would like to say that on that day. Everything which was occurring now for me, it’s like taking any priceless gulp of my life ever. I was thinking about the moment which was shadowing me under an enormous happiness, which took me in to the grotesque valley. My heart and my soul was tolling with such feeling, I am thankful to GOD for giving me a father which is more than anything in this whole world.

It is said after lot of happiness we are cursed with some hell lot of sorrow & grief; I will say it’s true. Yeah it is only if you are walking off road and you don’t know who’s on the road driving too. It was all happened in middle of the night when the half moon was showing his ugly face to the earth. I was on the walkway waiting for dad to bring me some ice-cream. He said to me son “Wait here son after all this day now its time to have some sweetness to the mouth too” Let me bring you some ice-cream for ya.

I was there on the other side of the road thinking of this luckiest day of my life, which I might have never thought of having in this wonderful way. I am really thankful to GOD for blessing me with a great father. There was not much rush over that shop where dad went to buy ice-cream. My father just turned around with a two scooped ice-cream corn in their both hands. I was standing their alone on the other side of street watching dad with the ice-cream. I felt so exciting that I started clapping and that made me so ecstatic that I can’t control my joy over this.

Everything was there in my life at this vary moment and life was so high to me that I can’t even express what it feels like. I kept watching my dad until he crossed the road and come over to me by my side with whole lot of sweetness in their hands. It was going well as the air blows around by your side a subtle aura which makes you feel as normal. That day I realize what the time is? Time is the only thing on this earth which is deliberately made to change everything. It all happened so quickly that I was not able to grasp a single thing. When you toss up a coin you think of what fall will it take? I felt on that day about the tossing of life from one is head than other has to be head that what we keep expecting in our life. This was different it flipped up everything from heads to tail of my life on that few minutes when my father were crossing the road lane and approaching towards me. I saw life turning in to hell lot of disturbance and loosing the mundane mind in just seconds. No one to blame for because that drunken man just hit my dad over and ran off like a light gets hidden after getting so far. That car was some kind of a race pinch machine because when it hit my dad I was close to him he were just few feet away from me. When the car passed out I saw my shirt half filled with blood and the ice cream which my dad bought for me was all over with it. I just ran hold on to my dad and started crying as hell in middle of the road on that night. No one is even bothering to call an ambulance even after such gigantic incident. That was the moment when I realize one thing no one on this earth care for you, only you are the one who has to bother for yourself. I waited their crying thinking of my dad like darkness all over me with a feeling of killing me with a breakdown.

After a long wait an ambulance came with four people and their stuff inside their van like filled with full of gadgets. I was just crying like a person when he looses something which is for him as everything. A cop came to me while I was crying and he took me to police station. I was thinking of my dad, thou I was not accepting to leave my dad like this. I was crying and crying until that cop just hold my hand saying “Son how far you go their always light in your lantern trust me.” Just come with me son everything will be fine and I am here to take care of you. He said every word like a gentleman who can understand the language of humanity.

When I reached police station there were many people who were watching me like I killed someone. It was seemed to them like that because of the shirt which I was wearing.

That cop said “Hey son I know you don’t have any words to say but all I want is you to co-operate on this. I promise that I will make a way out from this situation which you are being through and give you new light.

I was thinking always that I am nothing but a broken lantern that will never have light in his life. There are situation that occurs from no where and takes you somewhere. I think this is what was in my fate sitting here in the lobby of police station thinking of what can be more worst than this.

That cop whom I came with to this police station he was having long conversation with the doctor. They both were talking so quietly I was not able to grasp a single word from them. I kept watching them until the conversation gets over. While they were talking I saw tears in the eyes of that cop who bought me here. I think I got my answers from that reaction of that cop.

Doctor I have one question regarding that kid too.

I know Mr. Nair what question you have. The answer to that question might loose the strings of your brain and might you loose your pace. I am sorry to say sir but that kid can’t speak because he is mute but he is not deaf. He can understand things very well like a clock it ticks with sound but if you take away the sound it still works, this is the same condition with him

OMG “God I don’t know what to say doctor but I am thankful because you don’t know what was about to happen with him.” We got the name, the car and the guy who hit his father. The person who hit is father gave call to us plenty of time telling to take back that case and bribing us with money saying to put that kid under the act of pick pocketing.

You gave me the new eye to look on to this kid now I will make this kid away from all of it and give him new life. Thank you doctor you just gave him the light in his broken lantern. I promise I will never ever let his light blew away so easily and not like this at all.

Doctor I don’t know what to say but I feel myself as mute by living in this world in front of him.

Mr. Nair we live in the world of greed, now what you are facing is not greed its need of love and care. So just close your eyes and move your hand towards him as light until I know such star glows different in this world.

- “There is always things in life which is always there to lighten you up even in the darkness. No matter how dark it is in the night but I will say that there is light in the moon to give you light of hope.”