Philosophy

It was a bright sunny day. It always is, in Chennai. Our protagonist, Brad Pitt is an M.Phil student at the Madras Institute of Arts & Science. He was relaxing at the 3rd hour of the class. He actually does that every hour, but just needed to mention the time. At the end of the hour Prof. Higginbotham called him up to have a word, as he was the only guy relaxing and the rest others were sleeping.

“Brad, are you free next hour?”

“Yeah, professor. I’m free all the time. You want me to go home?”

“No, can you handle a UG class for the next hour, as I have an important meeting to attend and I find no substitute.”

“Huh? Me? Handle class?”

“It’s just a second year class. You just have to keep talking something till the end of the hour. Anyway they won’t be listening, I know.”

“Did you just mean, 2ndyr, B.A. Philosophy class?”

“Yes.”

Brad accepted to handle the class immediately as he knew that it was the class where Angelina Jolie studies. Angelina was the most beautiful girl that he has ever come across, since his ex-girlfriend Jennifer Aniston dumped him last month. He knew that she was one of those girls who like men who talk lots and lots without making any sense. And Brad, oh boy, is he good at that!

Brad made his entry into the 2ndyr B.A. Phil. There was a slight commotion in small groups. But most others didn’t bother.

“Isn’t he the senior guy” asked Angelina.

“Nope. He’s the masters guy” said her friend.

“What is he doing here?”

“That, how do I know?” said the visibly irritated friend.

“Guys! Prof. Higginbotham has an important meeting to attend and so I’m here to handle the class in the interim. So let’s head across.”

“He is the substitute lecturer” said Angelina.

“Yeah, I too heard that” said friend. Brad started his lecture.

“Have you ever wondered how humans evolved? Yeah, I know. That was a stupid question. When Charles Darwin, Herbert Spencer, Alfred Russel Wallace and many others have already postulated so many hypotheses and explained so many theories, it’s totally out of question to still keep “wondering”. We know the evolution theory already, don’t we?

Hmmm. Let me then re-phrase it, have you ever wondered what if Charles Darwin was wrong? What if Newton or Einstein or Bohr or Maxwell was wrong? For that matter we could keep questioning the credibility of every scientific theory and discoveries. We’ll have to keep out of the inventions because it is already “done”. For example, it’s ridiculous to question the theoretical relevance and principles behind the working of the wheel, since it is already working. That goes with every scientific invention. But we can keep questioning everything else - the big bang theory, evolution, number systems, time, distance, speed, gravity, magnetism and Malinga’s bowling. We have questions for everything, which certainly wouldn’t prove that all are wrong, but they have flaws.

‘Any theory or hypothesis holds true, until it is proved otherwise by another theory’. There were number of theories that were running through amidst the people during varying periods of time. Theories about sun, moon, stars, human evolution etc. Most of them were hypothetical and few were philosophical. And the one that was highly popular and accepted by most number of people was regarded as universally accepted theory. And if anyone fails to find flaws or solid evidence to support the flaws in that theory, it becomes the universally proven theory.

So, I come up with a theory with the hope that no one would try proving it wrong. A theory, that deals with the flaws of all the theories and scientific discoveries. To make it convenient, I’ve drawn assumptions from various previously proven theories. As a prelude to my theory, we can now only consider the human evolution. Human beings! Among all other living beings on the planet, human beings stand apart. Doesn’t that stand against the nature? Human beings are the only species that could manipulate the nature and bring on disaster. All the other species on the planet comply with the universal rules. Doesn’t that make us question about the credibility of the human evolution?”

And he goes on and on and on and on. He talks about evolution, relativity, Newton’s laws, astrology and he still goes on. Didn’t I say that he was good at that?

“Isn’t he interesting?”

Her friend who was in a semi-sleep state after Angelina jolted her, looked across the class. Out of the 40+ students, 15+ have already gone out, 15+ were sleeping and 5+ were busy with their usual chatting.

“Yeah, definitely” she went back to sleep.

At last, the hour came to an end. He knew he did a pretty good job. And it was lunch after 4th hour, but the students were already sleeping. As he walked out, Angelina came up to him and said,

“That’s the dumbest theory I’ve ever heard” with her gleaming eyes, mocking his attitude.

“Yeah, I could see that” said he, looking straight into her eyes. He knew that she was impressed. People don’t walk up to person and say your work sucks! They just ignore it. When she came up, he knew she liked it.

“You framed all those just to impress someone, didn’t you?”

“Well, not exactly... Those were just questions that pop out when “signature” or “imperial blue” gets inside. And yes of course I built it up and presented it so that someone with a like mind would be flattered.”

“Crap! You think you’ve succeeded?”

“You want a digital answer?”

“Yea, if that would do.”

“Yes.” (He grins)

(She smiles back)

“Would you like to have coffee?
Would you buy me a drink?” (Both ask at the same time)

“Certainly.”

What started in a coffee, turned out to be a serious relationship. Brad and Angelina later ended up living together. They, now, happily live with their six kids – 3 adopted and 3 biological kids.

The End