A dawn will break(it has to)

A year had passed by. But her eyes were still filled with the tremor of disbelief, shock and disgust. That day had changed my angel’s face forever. I had not seen a single curve on my bubbly beauty’s face ever since. She appeared like a living corpse; and looking at her this way, killed me even more. But my agony was nothing compared to what she had encountered on that violent monsoon night, and what every moment after that brought into her life.

Even now as she sits by the veranda staring at the crumpled rose plant, she found affinity with anything in pain. I could see the tear curtain trying to hide her heavy eyes. Those were the same eyes which often spoke the melodies of love every time I held her hands. I must admit, those were priceless moments. Her chapped lips hardly spoke any words today, except the screams of fear that her nightmares bring to her. Yes, they were the same lips which once kissed me every time I said, ‘I love you’. I still remember how I used to greedily say continuous ‘I love yous’ just to get non-stop kisses followed by her cozy cuddle.

I was smiling like a fool now. What more could I do? This was all that I have now to cheer me up. I had to stay strong. There were moments when I planned of knocking at the doors of death, but I couldn’t leave her alone, no way. She is my world, and No matter what the world says, I will always love her. After all, I have taken the seven sacred vows witnessed by the fire; to be on her side no matter what happens. And until my very last breath, I will be loyal to my promise.

I decided to make a cup of tea for myself, the maid was on leave today. As I began boiling water, I heard a sudden sound. I quickly ran into the veranda. What I saw there made my nerves tremble. My legs felt weak, body began to shiver, I sat down on the ground feeling helpless. But then I realized, I had no time to waste. Quickly gathering back my senses, I rushed to carry Priya up. She had tried to commit suicide again. She was unconscious now. I carried her out, made her sleep on the back of my car. With tears in my eye, I told the watchman to look after the house and started the engine. This was the fourth suicide attempt made by her, and like the previous times I had to save her.

My name is Athul and Priya is my wife. We had met during our college days accidently during a ragging session. Months after that we both fell in love and after six years of unconditional attachment, we got married. Everything was perfectly the same until that one night. That was the night which changed our lives forever. I still remember, it was three months back from that night since Priya had told me about my promotion of being a Father. I was the happiest man in the world. We were going to have a small celebration candle light dinner that night, like we had in the past two months. But fate had something else planned for us.

It was a dark monsoon evening. Priya had told me she would be late from work that day. I had taken a day off to decorate the house for her. I wanted to make it special. I had asked her to give me a call when she was done, so that I could pick her up. Teasingly I remember her asking me, ‘Missing me already my honey cake?’. Those were the last words I heard from the Priya I knew. After that what happened totally changed everything for us. She did not give me a call, she decided to surprise me by coming home a little early, so she decided to take an auto. The auto driver had come like a satan into our lives.

Fooling my innocent wife about taking a shorter way, he took her to an abandoned place where four other men sat with alcohol bottles and cards; he threw her cell phone off before she could find any help. I am sure she tried to scream out, but in vain. Even if there was anyone would they even help her? Those demons one by one raped her in the most inhuman ways possible, continuously and left her there under the rain.

My wife, whose smallest bruise pained me, was now raped; and the worst part, I was unaware of it. I repeatedly tried calling her, but the calls did not get connected. I began to get worried. I quickly lodged a complaint, but the police did not take any immediate action but asked me to be patient. But after repeated insistence, the inspector filed an FIR, and decided to find my missing wife. After 3 hours of non-stop surveillance, she was found. My beloved was drenching under the rain, in a pool of blood, naked. The sight made me unconscious.

Two lives departed that night; the little life that had still not seen the world, stopped breathing and my loving wife whose breath was saved, but life taken. It took me weeks to recover from the pain. My wife had not spoken a word ever since. How could she!

Society added to our pain. My wife’s modern clothing was labeled as an invitation for rape; her friendly nature was called an act of seduction; a few said she must have been drunk that night and a few others said she must have done something to attract the men. The media also made it a living hell for us; after all they wanted to be champions in framing the best possible headline. Rape was not just the atrocity, the after-rape atrocity committed by the society was even worse. What happened to the rapists? They are still free. The case closed. After all ours is the same country where words like ‘Justice’ stay cozily only in the constitution.

I finally reached the City hospital. Quickly with the help of the nurses, we shifted Priya on to a stretcher. I could not afford to lose her. I kept telling her only one thing, ‘I love you my sweetheart, and I will always be there for you, always’, although she couldn’t hear it(or maybe she could).

As they took her inside the emergency room, I looked at her, still wishing that she would just get up from the stretcher, walk to me and give me a tight hug. Tears rolled down my cheeks. I was an atheist an year ago, but now I knocked the doors of all the heavenly residents. I could do anything for her. Her smile kept haunting me, her pranks began to surround me, the very thought of her touch began to tease me. For two hours I kept trembling restlessly.

I suddenly remembered that night in particular; both of us sleeping on the terrace looking at the stars above, with a crescent moon spying on our romance. Priya crawled over me that night and kissed me on my forehead and said, ‘Don’t you ever leave me. No matter what happens. I cannot imagine a life without you’ ,And I remember kissing her back and telling her, ‘The day I leave you is the day my breath leaves me’.
Our love was true. It was pure. I was sure that nothing would happen to my wife, but somewhere in the corner of my heart, fear had already begun growing, erupting in the form of shivers.

As soon as I saw the doctor coming out, my heart began beating faster. The moment the doctor gave me a smile, I felt relieved. He said, ‘Your wife is out of danger Mr Athul, but she hasn’t gained consciousness yet, it will probably take some time’ and added saying, ‘She is very lucky to have you’. I quickly responded saying, ‘I am lucky to have her Doctor’ and quickly rushed in to see her.

A day passed by, and I did not move an inch away from her. I sat there holding her hands. Suddenly I felt her hands move. I looked at her. With tears in my eye, I fervently prayed. She had regained consciousness now. I smiled at her, with tears still flowing. And what happened next, lit a spark of hope in my heart, she smiled back at me. I was the happiest man in the world. She then with trembling words and faint voice said, ‘I love you Athul’ with a sparkle in the eye. I replied saying, ‘I love you too, a lot a lot a lot a lot my sweetheart’, and kissed her hands.

Just like they say, no matter how long the night has stayed, a dawn will break (it has to). Till then, we just have to be bold and keep moving. Life will surely smile back at you all over again.